15 June 2010

Walking in Obedience.

When writing I usually start with the title = it gives me a launching point. Today I don't have a title to start with - I hope it comes as I write! I suppose that's because I don't really have a launching off point. It's been almost six months since my last update. I am surprised because it really feels like yesterday and about a year ago at the same time! Here's an update as to what has gone on for us -

1. My lungs stayed in my body - I got med's. (God is GOOD!)
2. B caught my illness (God is GOOD!)
3. He almost died. (HONEST) (God is GOOD!)
4. We accrued about a half million dollar medical bill - bills (God is GOOD!)
5. God covered it all! (see? God is GOOD!)
6. J has been sick - lot's too - (6 ear infections during these months) having tubes put in tomorrow. (God is GOOD!)
7. B and M worked threeeeee (3) full time jobs for 6 months. (God is GOOD!)
7.1 J stayed with B and M as they worked the jobs. (God is GOOD!)
7.2 J got very very tired of pack'n'plays, walkers, and high chairs. Finally she revolted. (God is GOOD!)
8. M burneed out. (God is GOOD!)
9. B got sick - again. (God is GOOD!)
10. We got him med's faster than fast. (God is GOOD!)
11. He is doing better. (God is GOOD!)

There you go. That's the summery summery - God is GOOD. E did great - considering - it was a rough semester for everyone. Especially the kids. Not having family close isn't easy during these times - Grandparents and family help to smooth lot's of hurt. Especially if your under 150 years old. Luckily for us - our family made lot's of efforts to come see us in the last couple months - like I said - that smooths lot's of hurts!

I try to stay on our family as a topic around here - no need to go into details about other stuff. We are doing lot's of praying right now. LOTS! God is so very GOOD and he never never never takes us through rough waters without a reason - perhaps it's not my reason - perhaps it's not my desire. But he didn't ask - he created me and provides for me. I wait. wait. wait. And while I wait - he provides in so many ways -

1. Friends and friends who love.
2. Friends who support and reach out.
3. Friends who DON'T attack but encourage.
4. Family who will come and hug you when you need it.
5. Friends who take a kid when you need to breath for a moment.
6. A network of friends who pray for me = us.
7. We are not alone! Regardless of what our mind may tell us - we live in a world based on TRUTH not emotions. Thank goodness! Jesus is our truth - and our rock. We cling - we wait. We ask - seek - and FIND!

J is walking - well, nearly running - she is an amazing child - all over the place and except for a moment (several weeks!!!) of major reaction to two different antibiotics and then the steroids to help that (wowowowowowow) (her dear Aunt L renamed her for that time....) she refuses to be grouchy the whole time she feelt poorly. She is honestly the most content baby I have EVER met. Lucky ME!

E is growing like a weed - went through her cloths for summer and was SHOCKED to see how much she had grown! Had to recreate a whole new wardrobe. We enjoyed that! :) Her heart toward God and others is so sweet to see taking shape. She tries so hard to not upset or do wrong - in fact, so hard that sometimes she lies to help us not get upset with her - we are working with her on that....

B is getting well - again. Worried me (until God reminded me NOT to do that!) that he would get bronchitis again so soon after his last illness. The dr's took it VERY seriously and immediately put him on heavy med's to knock it out of the park! It seems to be working!!! He is busy praying and planning - and seeking God's wisdom.

SIDENOTE - Are we not glad that we don't have to seek our own wisdom and that age has NOTHING to do with that? Now, if we are wise, we will accrue wisdom as we grow - but there are plenty of people who seem to have FORGOTTEN to do that as they aged. Spiritual maturity has nothing to do with age - and it's so sad. God wants us to learn as we grow - and if we as (30 somethings) can realize we have LOT'S of growing to do - than why can't those physically older than us have already realized that they are still growing too? The bible says not to despise our youth - so we push on! God reminding me through B that we are his anointed - (we are ALL his anointed!) and that we are exactly where God wants us to be. Can you say that about your life today? Are you exactly where God wants you? IF NOT - seek and MOVE! There is nothing like knowing that you are all God is calling you to be today!

M - well, I'm here! I have wanted to write for a long time. But sometimes, writing is not quite the right thing to do! There are times that there are things better left unsaid. Better left unfelt too if you ask me! But I didn't get asked - so I wait on GOD - not MAN! I have to say, that God has been working overtime to encourage me lately. From friends with kind words - to books that give such insight - to even being offered a few jobs that although it's not the right time to take them - it was such a self esteem booster to be asked!!! Do you know what I mean? Sometimes - as a sahm (stay-at-home-mom) (well - if you read earlier - I have been that and more recently!!!) one can begin to feel that the world forgot that you too went to college. You too were trained - and you too have held some jobs that were more than starter positions! It can sometimes feel (like when pre-admitting your baby for eartubes at the hospital and they comment that all you do is stay home?!!!!) that you got lost in the shuffle! Not that is has been a CHOICE for your FAMILY! ha! Well - we gals know that we chooooose this and that we could be working - if we were called to do that! God is GOOD! It's not on man's approval that we base our actions - but on obedience to our LORD.

PS. My daddy taught me years ago that obedience means -
"Doing what you are told to do, when you are told to do it, with the right heart attitude".

IF you don't do all three - than you are not truly obedient.

Well, we are called to be obedient to God, to those in authority over us, and to our spiritual leaders. It is such a FREEDOM to walk in obedience! For my girls - I see them grow and find joy in the safety of their obedience - and for me and B - I see the same as we walk in God's hands!

Are you obedient today? Oh! I think I have found my title!

Walking in Obedience.

When writing I usually start with the title = it gives me a launching point. Today I don't have a title to start with - I hope it comes as I write! I suppose that's because I don't really have a launching off point. It's been almost six months since my last update. I am surprised because it really feels like yesterday and about a year ago at the same time! Here's an update as to what has gone on for us -

1. My lungs stayed in my body - I got med's. (God is GOOD!)
2. B caught my illness (God is GOOD!)
3. He almost died. (HONEST) (God is GOOD!)
4. We accrued about a half million dollar medical bill - bills (God is GOOD!)
5. God covered it all! (see? God is GOOD!)
6. J has been sick - lot's too - (6 ear infections during these months) having tubes put in tomorrow. (God is GOOD!)
7. B and M worked threeeeee (3) full time jobs for 6 months. (God is GOOD!)
7.1 J stayed with B and M as they worked the jobs. (God is GOOD!)
7.2 J got very very tired of pack'n'plays, walkers, and high chairs. Finally she revolted. (God is GOOD!)
8. M burneed out. (God is GOOD!)
9. B got sick - again. (God is GOOD!)
10. We got him med's faster than fast. (God is GOOD!)
11. He is doing better. (God is GOOD!)

There you go. That's the summery summery - God is GOOD. E did great - considering - it was a rough semester for everyone. Especially the kids. Not having family close isn't easy during these times - Grandparents and family help to smooth lot's of hurt. Especially if your under 150 years old. Luckily for us - our family made lot's of efforts to come see us in the last couple months - like I said - that smooths lot's of hurts!

I try to stay on our family as a topic around here - no need to go into details about other stuff. We are doing lot's of praying right now. LOTS! God is so very GOOD and he never never never takes us through rough waters without a reason - perhaps it's not my reason - perhaps it's not my desire. But he didn't ask - he created me and provides for me. I wait. wait. wait. And while I wait - he provides in so many ways -

1. Friends and friends who love.
2. Friends who support and reach out.
3. Friends who DON'T attack but encourage.
4. Family who will come and hug you when you need it.
5. Friends who take a kid when you need to breath for a moment.
6. A network of friends who pray for me = us.
7. We are not alone! Regardless of what our mind may tell us - we live in a world based on TRUTH not emotions. Thank goodness! Jesus is our truth - and our rock. We cling - we wait. We ask - seek - and FIND!

J is walking - well, nearly running - she is an amazing child - all over the place and except for a moment (several weeks!!!) of major reaction to two different antibiotics and then the steroids to help that (wowowowowowow) (her dear Aunt L renamed her for that time....) she refuses to be grouchy the whole time she feelt poorly. She is honestly the most content baby I have EVER met. Lucky ME!

E is growing like a weed - went through her cloths for summer and was SHOCKED to see how much she had grown! Had to recreate a whole new wardrobe. We enjoyed that! :) Her heart toward God and others is so sweet to see taking shape. She tries so hard to not upset or do wrong - in fact, so hard that sometimes she lies to help us not get upset with her - we are working with her on that....

B is getting well - again. Worried me (until God reminded me NOT to do that!) that he would get bronchitis again so soon after his last illness. The dr's took it VERY seriously and immediately put him on heavy med's to knock it out of the park! It seems to be working!!! He is busy praying and planning - and seeking God's wisdom.

SIDENOTE - Are we not glad that we don't have to seek our own wisdom and that age has NOTHING to do with that? Now, if we are wise, we will accrue wisdom as we grow - but there are plenty of people who seem to have FORGOTTEN to do that as they aged. Spiritual maturity has nothing to do with age - and it's so sad. God wants us to learn as we grow - and if we as (30 somethings) can realize we have LOT'S of growing to do - than why can't those physically older than us have already realized that they are still growing too? The bible says not to despise our youth - so we push on! God reminding me through B that we are his anointed - (we are ALL his anointed!) and that we are exactly where God wants us to be. Can you say that about your life today? Are you exactly where God wants you? IF NOT - seek and MOVE! There is nothing like knowing that you are all God is calling you to be today!

M - well, I'm here! I have wanted to write for a long time. But sometimes, writing is not quite the right thing to do! There are times that there are things better left unsaid. Better left unfelt too if you ask me! But I didn't get asked - so I wait on GOD - not MAN! I have to say, that God has been working overtime to encourage me lately. From friends with kind words - to books that give such insight - to even being offered a few jobs that although it's not the right time to take them - it was such a self esteem booster to be asked!!! Do you know what I mean? Sometimes - as a sahm (stay-at-home-mom) (well - if you read earlier - I have been that and more recently!!!) one can begin to feel that the world forgot that you too went to college. You too were trained - and you too have held some jobs that were more than starter positions! It can sometimes feel (like when pre-admitting your baby for eartubes at the hospital and they comment that all you do is stay home?!!!!) that you got lost in the shuffle! Not that is has been a CHOICE for your FAMILY! ha! Well - we gals know that we chooooose this and that we could be working - if we were called to do that! God is GOOD! It's not on man's approval that we base our actions - but on obedience to our LORD.

PS. My daddy taught me years ago that obedience means -
"Doing what you are told to do, when you are told to do it, with the right heart attitude".

IF you don't do all three - than you are not truly obedient.

Well, we are called to be obedient to God, to those in authority over us, and to our spiritual leaders. It is such a FREEDOM to walk in obedience! For my girls - I see them grow and find joy in the safety of their obedience - and for me and B - I see the same as we walk in God's hands!

Are you obedient today? Oh! I think I have found my title!

18 April 2010

To do, or not to do, the Dog is the question!

Dear Friends,

Dear World,

Dear Mom,

I need your help. I am in a conundrum - a real fix, and need a real solution. Our life is rather, ummm, busy right now. A rough calculation (using a handy on line time calculator) is that we are (as a family) clocking in about 110 hours a week. The joy of this is that our sweet girls are with us and we are enjoying the time. (That does not include our Sunday worship for anyone who is wondering) BUT it does leave me short on time for a few important things....

such as house work and dooooooggggs.

Yes, the dogs.

One has put on some weight - she isn't being worked enough.
The other?

Well, let's say, that in the past number of months, all training seems to have crawled out those shaggy little ears. He no longer tries to do anything worth trying. Such as being trained to take his bodily fluids outside.

I am at a loss....

I can't have a crawling baby go through a puddle!

So they have been outside most of the time for several months.

Darcy loves it. She doesn't care. She is the perfect dog.
HE welll.... she stands at the door and yelps. IF you let him in, he messes then stands at the door and yelps to go outside.

I am at my wits end. I thought about getting a crate again and starting crate training all over.

BUT I don't have time! I am not home through the day to let him out.

SO my friends...

What do you think we should do? I have never given up on an animal without due cause (Annie, my sweet stinker of a cat gave me hives) - but I am loosing my sanity.

Please help.

I would love your ideas.

me

16 February 2010

Two weeks in a lifetime!




I have always loved to travel.

For years I hoped that God would call me (then us) to overseas missions. Young people never think of fear, death, or the effects of both. At least most don't. I didn't at all - I just wanted to follow God! I have to admit, I was a bit disappointed when I began discovering that for now He kept sending us to areas around the US.

Not that it isn't needed - nor is it any less important. I just wanted to raise my children overseas - in a different culture(not to worry, we have hit that several times!) and to know that they were not completely sucked into the sudo-american attack of greed and nastiness! (NOT that there is a lack of greed and nastiness other places... )

Regardless, I found joy in the current deployments (that's what it is you know...) and have loved being in different cultures in the so very different area's of the US. This being said... our stay in the hospital with Brad has changed my mind.

Home missions is GOOD.

American medical system is GOOD. (well, better than most!)

We had a lovely Dr. while in ICU. He is from Columbia (the country, not school...) and lived and worked overseas - most currently had spend four years in NYC (which after all feels like another country...) I think this lead to his great ability to think "outside the box" in treating B. He tested for many scary options to his illness, and (PRAISE GOD) found them all negative. He treated B and I as though we were old friends and his kindness was remarkable. He even called us yesterday to talk and see how B was! I pray that he finds a church home and is loved on!

During his visit's in B's hospital room he shared some stories. One of which, was the remarkable difference in health care that we have available to us versus the other posts he has been at. In one such post, we would have been allowed to put B on a gurney and set him inside the doors of the ICU, then when we brought back twenty-thousand dollars they would have begun treatment. So kind of them.... $20,000!!!! This was in a third world country...

I shutter to think what could have happened if I had pushed and had my way. To be overseas when such a medical emergency arose. No doubt God could and would take care of us. BUT how much better to know that we are in the will of God NOW and we literally drove less than a minute down the road and around one corner and we had GREAT medical care?! America is amazing! I may be paying off this bill for several lifetimes, but I have a husband and a bill. Not a gurney and a promise of help IF...

May this be a lesson to me, and to you. Find JOY in the moment! Right now, where ever you are - are you in the will of God? Have you asked, sought, and found where you are supposed to be? OR have you pushed and pulled, and finagled your way into a cozy spot of your own making? It's not worth it friends! It's not worth it! The protection of our Lord is worth a million personal satisfactions!

I have several people on my heart today, friends pushing their way through life, family seeking the next posting of the Lord (overseas!! in missions!!), and I have you on my heart. I pray that you find true JOY today! Jesus, Others, and finally Yourself!

Love you lots....
Meg

07 February 2010

Asking for prayer - seeking answers!

Dear Friends and Family,

I wanted to give an update as to what we have been facing the last week.  I have been praying about how open to be with the details.  BUT I feel as though some of this depends on our pushing into God will for our lives and for our family.  HE alone knows what the outcome of this will be - and GLORY will be given to him alone!

We have had such support this week.  Ray and Dianne (B's parents) have sent Dianne to stay with us.  She has cooked, cleaned, and laundered so much!  We are so very appreciate to them and to our church family who have brought us food nearly EVERY NIGHT!  Thank you!

Below is a shortened version of what is going on.  I don't share this for any reason other than to elicite prayers for God's hand to shine through in our lives! 

Brad and I were sick this past couple weeks.  Mostly i had some sort of nasty bug that went into bronchitus.  B suddenly came down with it (BAD) and ended up in the emergency room last Sunday morning.  They sent us home saying it was just the flu ("it's the flu, it's gonna hurt - take tylenol")  But Monday at three in the morning I ended up bringing him back (he couldn't breath).  Both of his lungs were 80% filled (compacted) with severe double pneumonia.  He had also begun to have septicemia. 

They rushed him into ICU and he spent three days there.  They considered him in critical condition and it was really scary.  Two days ago they finally moved him into a regular room and then did a procedure where they went in and vacuumed out the left over "pus" (the dr's word!!) out of his lungs and then took some tissue samples.  They are really concerned as to why a healthy 33 year old male would get this sick in just a few days.    His immunology numbers were so low -  a normal healthy adult is 3,000 (for referencce, an HIV patient would be 300 - 500.)  Brad comes in at 59.  Yes, 59. So basically he has NO imune system right now.  We don't know why and he tests negative to everything they have tested for.  So either this is a fluke thing or it might be something we will have some real challenges to find.  Either way, right now he has to stay on a whole bunch of med's to help him not catch everything around him.

So, where are we?  Strangly at peace!  We know that we serve a God that heals.  Our bodies are his and B has lived a life giving honor to the Lord!  We are so thankful that we know whatever is fighting his body was not brought on by his decisions!  His life really has been one searching for God and we know that the Lord will honor this!

Thank you for your prayers!

M and B E.  

29 January 2010

A glimmer of light...


Meet my new best friend (also known as BFF). Who says you can't buy friends? B bought him for me yesterday. We instantly had a strong bond that quickly grew. His back and arms are strong enough to support while his gentle side keeps this in balance and his weight provides the traction our relationship needs! I am in love...

I slept until TEN this morning... Only getting up once for meds - that's a first in several weeks! YEAH! See? My new friend already paid for himself! B got up and took E to school, fed and played with J and got her down for a nap. I woke up as he was coming back to bed. He is there now - I took my BFF and went to the couch. Now I can get comfy anywhere. HAHAaaaa chest - you can't get the best of me!

Ok, so you might be thinking M has flipped. Sure - 5 weeks of illness is enough to make anyone flip. BUT at the same time she has learned many important things.

  1. Listen to your mom
  2. Listen to your dad
  3. Listen to your Mum-in-law
  4. Listen to your sis-in-law
  5. Listen to your mum
  6. Reappearance of an illness really does happen
  7. "Walking pneumonia" is real
  8. It will lower your resistance to other things - so now, a flu bug on top of other stuff is very real....
  9. i am not longer 20.
  10. This is all very sad - they were right.... I was wrong.
  11. God created Dr's. - let them help you.
  12. I will never do this again.
These thoughts led me to these newer thoughts -
  1. I have a mum, dad, and mum-in-law, and sis-in-law who were way smarter than I.
  2. I am thankful they haven't rubbed this in my very sick little face.
  3. I hope anyone reading my pathetic updates lately takes me with a BIG grain (or jar) of salt. I like to write - I like to express - I am not nearly as self indulgent (usually) as in the last number of posts...
There was a Gary Larson (The Far Side?) cartoon the I used to love. It was a cow (he loves cows) upside down in a field. Legs up in the air. The caption read "No, Really, I'm Fine". It made me laugh like crazy. I spent forever this morning on google looking for it to share with you. It isn't out there - or it was hiding from me. Regardless, it was too funny. My parents gave it to me on a mug in high school. I think part of it was that I hate being sick. I hate being hurt. SO I tend to live in denial and push forward until kicked flat. Much like the cow.

What does all this have to do with anything?

When I woke at ten this morning, I coughed (a usual 24/7 thing right now - leading to my BFF) and tada - it sounded better!!! Then I got up and tada - I feel a teeeeny weeeennie bit better!

(Shouts of excitement overcome with awe as confetti and balloons spill from the sky...)

So, my first thought was - oh goodie - I can finish the laundry today.

(Now glares of irritation and slow shaking of heads..)

NO. I WILL NOT. I WILL NOT.

I will force myself to lay here.

I hate laying.

BUT I WILL LAY HERE.....

and write.... if that keeps me laying.

and I will get well!

Because - I am no longer a Gary Larson cartoon!

Thanks Mom, Dad, Dee, and Leslie for being right in love - next time, I am setting up the dr's appt. right away!

HAHA! So, hopefully soon I will be terrorizing people in person. But today I will lay here and listen to the rain, my body gently being held by my BFF. (Which, by the way, where do you "store" one of these things when you no longer need it?) (Perhaps that's a question for another day....)

28 January 2010

Another one bit the dust, or reacurence of illness, brings a chill to ME home...

Another one bit the dust. B came home, shivering without control. Even teeth. Had him do what I had to do yesterday - go sit under hot shower. It was the ONLY way to stop my shivering yesterday - so today I had B do it. WHY if you have a fever and are HOT is your body so very cold? After about ten min or so suddenly the body changes and it calms down. Very strange. Also brought him copious amounts of acetaminophen and ibuprofen.

So, now we discover that we are at opposite ends of the fever trail. When I am cold, he seems hot, and so on. Rather irritating I can tell you. It would be so much better if he would adjust his thermostat to mine.

Years ago, my dear friends had a marvelous idea. We should all live together in a compound. This perhaps was influenced by some cinematography of great excitement - but never the less, we have always found the idea hideous with anyone other then them. (well, nearly - some present family and friends excluded...)

But tonight, as I lay here - hoping for my next codeine induced burst of energy and pazaz (so that i might relax enough to sleep - and not tear anymore back muscles through my interpretation of a 1. walrus in the midst of fighting for his lady love or 2. the last few moments of an emphysemics life. ) I find myself in dire desire of having followed through with their idea.

It occurs to me -
  1. I have two children
  2. One is of school age
  3. One is still in diapers (which left untended smell worse than death)
  4. Both are in need of food and care.
Well.

In ministry you give up certain inalienable rights. Much like the Pilgrims crossing the ocean. Family may or may not live near. Tonight, I consider having family or my imagined commune around to be a rather dear idea.

Especially tonight

Which leads me onto my (excuse me, I just hacked up a lung - b sat straight up in bed and asked me how often I can take the cough med - the one I just took 20 min ago and can only have every 6 hours. This may be a long night or a long post....)

Especially Tonight.

God's grace is enough - isn't that good? Because of this - if we did indeed have a fever that presented itself at the same time than b would most likely be awake right now Not sleeping beside me only tossing when I try to share my walrus interpretation!

So, in the midst of illness - rest is happening and healing to our bodies. Perhaps slower or less obvious than I would care for. But already tonight B needed less medication than I had shared with myself at the same time yesterday.

Oh - and did I tell you, that God provides all things? Yesterday I was gifted the kindest gift I could ever had imagined (given the illness' desire to limit my dreaming past my current pain) = someone canceled their dr.'s appt! I called once, busy - called again - and tada - a time open.

Now, I didn't know this till later - but that is the way it works sometimes isn't it? God makes a way, opens doors - smooths roads less traveled. And, after, we look back and his hand was working every moment of every day. Why must I be ill now? I am not sure that's in God's will or plan - pain, illness, disease - part of SINS ravishing of the beauty called Man. God's creation - marred by pain.

So, as I sit here - well, lay, I can feel Codeine working it's magic and the spell checker is going nuts. But I also sit here in Awww of a God who works all things, knows all things, and loves all things. Even me - when sick, am taken care of.

Well, the alarm is set for six - and I need to plan on shuffling through to make the coffee, feed the children, and hopefully find that two days of horse shaped pills (hiding under the disguise of an antibiotic) will have begun the miraculous job they were created for.

May I too continue the miraculous job I was created for. To parent, love, guide, and walk beside my husband. WHO may just feel worse in the morning, but that's OK - I can bring him some ibuprofen.

Another one bit the dust, or reacurence of illness, brings a chill to ME home...

Another one bit the dust. B came home, shivering without control. Even teeth. Had him do what I had to do yesterday - go sit under hot shower. It was the ONLY way to stop my shivering yesterday - so today I had B do it. WHY if you have a fever and are HOT is your body so very cold? After about ten min or so suddenly the body changes and it calms down. Very strange. Also brought him copious amounts of acetaminophen and ibuprofen.

So, now we discover that we are at opposite ends of the fever trail. When I am cold, he seems hot, and so on. Rather irritating I can tell you. It would be so much better if he would adjust his thermostat to mine.

Years ago, my dear friends had a marvelous idea. We should all live together in a compound. This perhaps was influenced by some cinematography of great excitement - but never the less, we have always found the idea hideous with anyone other then them. (well, nearly - some present family and friends excluded...)

But tonight, as I lay here - hoping for my next codeine induced burst of energy and pazaz (so that i might relax enough to sleep - and not tear anymore back muscles through my interpretation of a 1. walrus in the midst of fighting for his lady love or 2. the last few moments of an emphysemics life. ) I find myself in dire desire of having followed through with their idea.

It occurs to me -
  1. I have two children
  2. One is of school age
  3. One is still in diapers (which left untended smell worse than death)
  4. Both are in need of food and care.
Well.

In ministry you give up certain inalienable rights. Much like the Pilgrims crossing the ocean. Family may or may not live near. Tonight, I consider having family or my imagined commune around to be a rather dear idea.

Especially tonight

Which leads me onto my (excuse me, I just hacked up a lung - b sat straight up in bed and asked me how often I can take the cough med - the one I just took 20 min ago and can only have every 6 hours. This may be a long night or a long post....)

Especially Tonight.

God's grace is enough - isn't that good? Because of this - if we did indeed have a fever that presented itself at the same time than b would most likely be awake right now Not sleeping beside me only tossing when I try to share my walrus interpretation!

So, in the midst of illness - rest is happening and healing to our bodies. Perhaps slower or less obvious than I would care for. But already tonight B needed less medication than I had shared with myself at the same time yesterday.

Oh - and did I tell you, that God provides all things? Yesterday I was gifted the kindest gift I could ever had imagined (given the illness' desire to limit my dreaming past my current pain) = someone canceled their dr.'s appt! I called once, busy - called again - and tada - a time open.

Now, I didn't know this till later - but that is the way it works sometimes isn't it? God makes a way, opens doors - smooths roads less traveled. And, after, we look back and his hand was working every moment of every day. Why must I be ill now? I am not sure that's in God's will or plan - pain, illness, disease - part of SINS ravishing of the beauty called Man. God's creation - marred by pain.

So, as I sit here - well, lay, I can feel Codeine working it's magic and the spell checker is going nuts. But I also sit here in Awww of a God who works all things, knows all things, and loves all things. Even me - when sick, am taken care of.

Well, the alarm is set for six - and I need to plan on shuffling through to make the coffee, feed the children, and hopefully find that two days of horse shaped pills (hiding under the disguise of an antibiotic) will have begun the miraculous job they were created for.

May I too continue the miraculous job I was created for. To parent, love, guide, and walk beside my husband. WHO may just feel worse in the morning, but that's OK - I can bring him some ibuprofen.